Save A Place For Me Rach!

I heard Matthew West today talking on the radio about how he sang this song at his grandmother's funeral. I sat in the car crying. It made me think so much of my cousin Rachel. I'm sure glad my boss wasn't on time today. I don't think I could have handled a conversation. Here is the song and Rachel's story.

Rachel is my only female "first cousin." She is eight years older than me. As a child I followed her around, wanting to be just like her. She we was my favorite babysitter as she would often tie up my brother just for kicks. Growing up we spent so many waking hours together as we both worked for her parents' family construction company. As adults we were very close friends. We talked on the phone almost every other day and tried to see each at least twice a month if not more. I would regularly drive 45 minutes just to spend her lunch hour with her. She was my rock outside my husband. She was my creative eye when mine just wouldn't work. She meant so much to me and nothing has changed, and that has not changed even though she know longer occupies this earthly world.

The week my world changed... September 17th 2008, I was pregnant and six weeks out from my due date. I got a phone call from my mom telling me that I needed to come to Stockton (the town I was born in and 45 mins from where we lived). My mom needed to get to the hospital because her only niece, my cousin, had collapsed and was taken to the hospital. My mom had already taken her night time medication so she could not drive herself. I promptly called my boss told her the situation and that I would not be at work the next day then I packed a bag and got in the car. I picked up my mom and headed to the hospital. 

My cousin was taken to the hospital where my mom worked so we quickly found ourselves in the back of the ER where the rest of my family was. We got there to some devastating news. Rachel had a blood vessel break in her brain (similar to an aneurysm). She had complained to her husband, James, that her ear hurt and that it was making her dizzy. She went to sit down and collapsed. Her blood pressure was incredibly high and she was put on life support so that her body could focus on healing her brain. Rachel was admitted to the ICU late that night. 

The next morning her blood pressure was more stable but she was in a drug induced coma. Wednesday and Thursday she was about the same with only minor changes. When I saw her on Wednesday I said hi to her and held her hand. The moment I put my hand in her hand and said her name she slightly gripped my hand and then relaxed it. She had been keeping her fists clenched so it was a big deal to me that she relaxed it. The doctor said it was just a reflex. I didn't take it well. I felt like she was letting me know that she knew I was there and that this would be our last exchange. I left filled with mixed emotions while they prepped her for some more tests. The tests determined that the bleeding had not stopped.

I took off work early on Friday, September 20th, to go and be with my family at the hospital. I got there about 2 pm and visited with some family and friends I had not seen in a while. At about 4:50 pm I decided to go back into my cousin's room. Right as I got to the glass that divides ICU rooms from the nurse's station my Uncle stopped me. He asked me not to go in because Rachel was having a bad spell. He asked me to go back to the waiting room and call my Aunt, who was out running errands for Rachel's husband. My uncle came and told me that her heart rate had dropped and that she was having a seizure.

Just before 7 pm my Uncle, Aunt and cousin James came into the waiting room and shut the door. They told us that her heart rate had dropped and that and that the only thing that could be done at this point was to give her meds every 2-3 hours and that the meds would cease to help her seizures and heart rate at some point. During her last episode the neurologist came in to tell the family that she had no more brain function and that she was fully dependent on artificial life support. My Aunt, Uncle and James told us then that they made the decision to let go and they wanted the family's support in that decision. We as an entire family unit made the decision to donate her organs. Rachel's lungs, heart, kidneys and some skin were harvested for waiting recipients. Her eyes were the only thing that was considered non-viable because of diabetic damage. 

Rachel lives on in the lives of her three children and those lucky people who physically received portions of her. She will never be forgotten. She will forever be the best friend and cousin I could ever ask for. She was more like a sister than a cousin. I miss her dearly but I know that I will see her again someday. My biggest comfort is knowing that she is in Heaven with our grandparents and my Dad. As Rachel used to always say about our grandparents "only the good die young!"

RLS 8/2/76-9/20/08

Save a place for me Rach, I'll see you someday in Glory!

God Bless.